Promoting Independence: Children with Autism

It’s easy for us parents of autistic children to just do everything for them.  Let’s face it, teaching children independence whether or not they’re on the spectrum is time consuming. But it’s so important to take the time to do it.  I used to do everything for mine just because it’s faster and I wanted to avoid a meltdown, but I wasn’t doing him any favors.  

A common goal for parents is to raise their children so they become independent functioning adults. This goal should be the same even for children with autism. Yes, they may take longer to learn certain skills, but most skills can be systematically taught. Independent living skills, also known as adaptive skills, are necessary for children with autism to learn in order to reduce the amount of assistance they will need as they develop into adults.

Tips to Develop Independence in Children with Autism:

  • Have high, yet realistic expectations – Only challenge your child to do things you know they can currently do. If your child has fine motor delays it would be unreasonable to expect them to tie their shoes without any prior training. However, they could start by putting both shoes on by themselves.
  • Set attainable goals – The goals can be either short-term (Removing socks independently) or long-term goals (Completing dressing routine independently)Independence
  • Start small – If your child cannot use buttons, start working on strengthening their fine motor skills and hand strength. Then eventually you can work up to using buttons.
  • Don’t do everything for your child – When you are in a rush it is usually easiest just to do everything for your child, but this is not helping them learn necessary skills. If your child is able to do a skill, make sure they have multiple opportunities to practice. They may involve rearranging your schedule slightly to allow for extra time for them to get dressed, take a bath, etc.
  • Start as soon as possible – Don’t wait until your child is reaching the teenage years to start teaching adaptive skills. Look at typical developmental milestones to see at what age children learn to do certain skills. Even children as young as 2 can start helping with their dressing routine, cleaning up, and other independent living skills.
  • Do not give in to behaviors which may be exhibited due to difficult tasks – If a particular task is challenging for your child, expect them to exhibit some negative behaviors in an attempt to get out of completing the task. In these types of situations, you will need to ignore all negative behaviors and make sure they complete the task instead of avoiding it.
  • Reinforce independent skills – When you see your child engaging independent behaviors, reward them so these behaviors continue in the future.

 

More info, nspt4kids.com and theautismcafe.com

We have been a family blessed with the help of the team at The Helm. Our son was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when he was 2.5 and The Helm was one of the places recommended by our developmental psychologist. I am a physician and still found it hard navigating this new medical problem and knowing what to do next. I called many places and from step one Lee Ann was the most helpful explaining the process with paperwork, assessment, available services, insurance, etc. we were able to start therapy quite soon after diagnosis and had sessions at home daily for 3 hours. The quality of staff, the system they have in place for the therapists, the coordination by the BCBA supervising therapist and early response put us at ease that we were on the right path. Ultimately the steady positive changes we saw with our son overcame any fears we had about autism holding our son back for the rest of his life.

We used many forms of intervention that we felt were individually tailored for our family – for potty training, anger management, dietary intervention and even let them know when we could not maintain something suggested in family training, and they would just take our request and implement another plan. Our son has now graduated/transitioned out of therapy and is currently in pre-K in a regular classroom with him on par with his class in academics, has friends and no behavior issues. Most important of all we have a happy son who loves to play with his big sister.

I know that I will always read all there is on autism and watch my son for any features. But I hope my review adds to positive aspects that I wish someone would have told me when I started the journey – start early, don’t put off your suspicions, get your child evaluated now! The label does not hinder,  in fact it falls to the side once you have the diagnosis to facilitate therapy. ABA intervention, especially done with the right people, makes a big difference. It does not pressure or upset the child at all, and you are not stuck in therapy for life! I know if any behavioral issues come up in the future I have The Helm, and they will help us and the outcome is going to be positive. Said with heartfelt thanks.

– Former Helm ABA Family

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